I’m really overwhelmed lately because of WHAP (AP World History) but my parents want me to graduate distinguished. I really wanna drop the class but my parents wont let me. I’ve tried multiple times to organize everything but it doesn’t work. What should I do?

I really recommend dropping the class only if it stresses you out beyond belief. I mean you’re meant to enjoy your high school career. Yet there are some methods of relaxation that I use whenever I get overwhelmed:

• Take a couple of deep breaths.
• Put on your favorite song and dance around like God is watching and is disappointed.
• Set time limits for studying and breaks (Ex: 30 min studying—10 min break)
• Light a candle or open a window.
• Turn your mind off and take a shower/bath.

With parents they continually try to live vicariously through their children therefore they want the best for them without considering their mental stability or opinion. You need to communicate to them that the class is not meshing well together with your sanity, that you’re stressed and its causing you to be unhappy. Besides the program doesn’t really matter since its nonexistent and colleges will already accept you before they even see the word ‘Distinguished’ on your diploma. Also, it doesn’t even have to be advanced class to graduate distinguished. I would highly suggest taking courses that fit you more than what your parents’ desire; as long as you can keep grades up to your set expectation, that’s all that counts. Keep your mind clear and your heart light, you only have a set amount of time to indulge in the luxuries of life; don’t waste it worrying about schoolwork.

Keep on being.

How do I navigate the school hallways and make it to class on time?

There are plenty of ways of getting through the claustrophobia afflicted hallways of Allen. First you need to fight for line-leader like you’re in first grade again—ON YOUR MARK, GET SET AND RUN DOWN THAT HALLWAY LIKE YOU’RE IN CHILDREN OF THE CORN. Lace up your Heelys if you have them and ride down carpeted race track—live to ride. Ride to live. But in all seriousness make sure to avoid the main hallway at all cost; find a detour or a different route. If people are blocking the way, maneuver your way through. If a couple is sucking face in your way, then slide straight between them—break them up. Only be a homewrecker if it’s for your education.

How to come out?

Coming out of the closet is one of the most emotional and terrifying things that someone can do, therefore you need to make sure that you’re confident in who you are before taking the leap. It should be taken extremely slowly, in that baby-steps are the key to helping you ease through this; coming out doesn’t happen in just one day. Start by planning who you will tell, how you will say it and responses for each reaction whether positive or negative—the last thing that you’d want, is to be unprepared in a position where the reaction differs from your expectation.

Personally, I suggest starting with the closest friend you can trust, sitting them down in a comfortable environment, and telling them. Think deeply about who you will tell first because it’ll definitely be the most difficult hurdle. I highly recommend for you to do this face-to-face, simply because with texting, you don’t know if they’ll screenshot it and send it around; besides it also makes it much more personal—it could even strengthen the relationship. If unsure on how to go about starting the conversation utilize these steps:

1. Start with normal conversation; you don’t have to jump straight into it.
2. Eventually find a point where you can interject your sexuality/gender identity.
3. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, relax your body and gather your thoughts.
4. Say, “Hey, you’re one of my closest friends and I really enjoy everything you do for me, I just wanted you to know that I am…”
5. Step back, and wait for their response.

I’m sure they’ll be extremely supportive, and if not they weren’t really friends to begin with. After informing them emotions may pour from both you and him/her, so that’s why I advise finding a place where you are most comfortable in; I wouldn’t recommend school only because of all the student bystanders. Lastly let the friendship continue normally, because you’ll most likely feel relieved yet a little uncomfortable around one another.

Next begin telling your siblings—if you have any—before your parents. Then plan a time where both parents are relaxed, comfortable and in the same room. Take a deep breath and calmly come out. Have a friend or loved one who already knows with you to help guide you through the conversation. Now this may go one of three ways:

• Complete acceptance
• Reserved feelings
• Intolerance

With the reserved feelings don’t fret because most likely parents are just taken by surprise. Let them mull it over in their heads for a couple of days/weeks/months and eventually they’ll come around; just don’t force it upon them all at once. With the intolerance make sure to have a backup plan. Think about whether it’s a smart decision to tell your parents when you’re relying on them financially. If you suspect they’ll disown you then I highly advise staying in the closet until you’re stable financially and emotionally. All in all take everything at a slow pace and understand that coming out isn’t a requirement—only do it when you’re ready.

TIPS:

• HAVE A BACKUP PLAN INCASE ALL GOES WRONG. Ex: Friends/other family member’s house to stay at.
• Before you tell anyone be prepared for the worst case scenario you can think of.

I’ve been feeling really down on my self-esteem lately. Any tips to boost my self-confidence?

Having confidence in this day and age is strenuous even more so than previous generations only because we have newer trends that promote beauty as a life or death aspect of being human; besides being a teenager is hard enough with the hormones, lost love and everything in between without the overbearing judgment following beauty. My advice would be to fake it until you make it, only because eventually it’ll become routine. You have to act like a Flaming Hot VersaCheeto in a bag of regular Cheetos, and everything else will follow suit.

My advice for gaining confidence is to reflect on the quirky traits you have that make you absolutely unique—perhaps it’s the way you laugh, the way you smile, the trivial things that make your entire day better, etc. Start with wearing what makes you feel more confident, and picking out one trait about yourself that you like—focus on the more positive aspects about you.

Secondly I suggest you stop comparing yourself to others because it’s just silly; stare straight ahead rather than looking around and noticing what you don’t have. Regardless of what your insecurities may stem from, whomever you look up to is probably more than meets the eye—you’ll never know the entirety of their problems and issues they have in their life.

Lastly you need to fall in love with your flaws and realize that perfection is completely overrated. Life would be an absolute drag if you were perfect. Just remember to surround yourself with people who love and support you—wrap yourself in positivity. Don’t forget that you’re important, unique and do matter.